Childbirth is a unique experience for every woman and, for this reason, we tend to talk about it very much and, perhaps, even mythologizing its various aspects. But is it possible to deal with childbirth in a realistic way and without clichés?
We asked Elisa Origi, author of the "comfort book" Giving birth, Porca Miseria! (Hygeia Press), which in the book he wanted to try to talk about I start in an alternative way and far from rhetoric, giving back a realistic face of this experience and with the aim of telling women everything that I did not hear her say and that instead would have made a positive difference.
The volume is accompanied by the introduction by the doctor Elena Bacchiega, experienced midwife. Furthermore, in the appendix there are ten stories of women who have experienced pregnancy and childbirth with very different approaches and perspectives.
In this article
- The biggest myth about childbirth to dispel
- How to deal with the fear of childbirth?
- How to prepare yourself psychologically in the right way?
- 10 things you need to know about childbirth that no one tells you
- "Give birth, damn it!", The book
"Give birth Porca Miseria!", The book
Elisa Origi explains that the idea of writing the book Partorire Porca Miseria! was born from the desire to put his passion for writing at the service of people who find themselves in a delicate moment of life, not only through fiction, but also in non-fiction.
«I had had an important experience, that of becoming a mother and it seemed to me that so many things I should have known were clear to me too late; perhaps because no one had explained them to me.
Thus trying to offer readers a journey through the emotions of childbirth, I tried to chart a course, drawing only on my experience and my way of putting it on paper, without any exhaustive claim, much less scientific, since I am neither a doctor nor a psychologist (but perhaps, precisely for this reason, I was able to allow myself the freedom to say things in a more direct, crude way, if we want) Says the author.Read also: Natural childbirth, 68 photos to find out what happens
The biggest myth about childbirth to dispel
«The pain of childbirth, too often, is diminished, considered an inevitable passage, which more or less all have survived. Instead, there are methods to reduce the great physical pain that we are forced to experience: it is not up to me to indicate which is the best (also because there is no one-size-fits-all solution), but what I recommend to every woman is to be aware of the possibilities of getting help not to turn the experience of childbirth into a nightmare, because sometimes that's what happens.
Feeling pain does not make us more affectionate mothers towards our baby and those who resort to an epidural, if they are in the physical condition to do so and if they are lucky enough to be able to give birth in a hospital equipped to administer it, not "coffin" ", explains Elisa .Read also: How natural childbirth works, 5 things to know
How to deal with the fear of childbirth?
"With awareness. Avoiding listening to those who say phrases like: "But yes, what will it ever be, women give birth from what world is the world". Giving birth is by no means trivial, it is a great test of courage from which we must be proud to have passed.
It is necessary to inquire, to visit the delivery room after the seventh month, not to approach the question hastily, with prejudices or with the criteria chosen by others. I would say to women: be your best allies, pregnancy gives birth not only to a child, but also to a mother. And mothers are called to give love, also and first of all to themselves ".Read also: Things You Don't Know About Childbirth
How to prepare yourself psychologically in the right way?
"Of course we must not be overwhelmed by the emotions that roll in our heads... and then in the belly for all those months! At the beginning it is difficult even to find the concentration to face the rest of life that must go on, while we would live only in the good news and we would not want to think about anything other than the child we will have and the life that will be!
We need to lean lightly on emotions, but welcome them with joy and positivity, even when we see some clouds on the horizon. Without exaggerating, I would say that it is good to read up and rely on the care of those who make us feel welcomedSays the writer.Read also: Home birth and hospital birth: safety compared in a new international study
10 things you need to know about childbirth that no one tells you
«It hurts: giving birth is painful. It is not said to scare, it is said to tell the truth. To women and men. The first piece of advice is awareness ».
«The motivation that drives us to face childbirth, that is love, can give great energy. This does not mean that we must think of relying only on the desire we have to hold our baby, ending up minimizing the situation that we find ourselves living in the labor room. The second advice is therefore prepare, through the roads that are considered most appropriate».
"We have the right to have a peaceful childbirth experience: “Fight against smiles, warnings and unsolicited advice».
«You demand medical competence and sensitivity in medical figures that will surround you: a good midwife, prepared, reassuring, capable of containing your fatigue is worth as much gold as it weighs ».
«Share your thoughts with those you love. Be among these people you too! ».
«Learn about postpartum depression: it can take many different shapes and can touch the hearts of all mothers, even those who have longed for their pregnancy ".
«For nine months, we won't be alone: the birth will deliver us back to us. This can make us feel responsible only for ourselves again. A little 'you breathe, a little' you find yourself fighting against loneliness. Devote a thought to this aspect ».
«Talk to your partner about what it means to him to assist you in childbirth: you are not obliged to do what everyone does and aspects and reasons of hypersensitivity may emerge that you would never have thought of. We are not all the same!".
«Listen all, but the final decision is yours: we are the mothers, cabbage! ».
«The skin of the baby bump appears all wrinkled and soft just after delivery: do not be frightened, then it goes back into place. It will be trivial, or perhaps it was intuitive, but no one had told me and I had not thought about it: so looking at what remained of my beautiful belly a little hurt made me stay ".
Questions and answers
What's the biggest myth about childbirth?
Feeling pain does not make us more affectionate mothers towards our baby and those who resort to an epidural, if they are in the physical condition to do so and if they are lucky enough to be able to give birth in an equipped hospital, not a "coffin".
How to psychologically prepare for childbirth?
We must not be overwhelmed by emotions, but welcome them with joy and positivity, even when we see some clouds on the horizon. Without exaggerating, it is good to read up and rely on the care of those who make us feel welcome.
How to deal with the fear of childbirth?
With awareness. It is necessary to inquire, to visit the delivery room after the seventh month, not to approach the question hastily, with prejudices or with the criteria chosen by others.
- give birth
- Natural childbirth