Nervous and agitated children, 5 situations that stress them and strategies to calm them down

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Marie-Ange Demory
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Weeping, tears, screams, shouts, screams. Then you sobbed. And then you cry, tears, screams, screams, screams. Sometimes you don't really know which saint to turn to to calm a baby, to make him relax, to help him sleep. Above all because, in the vast majority of cases, it is not clear what he needs: is he hungry? She's sleepy? Do you have colic? Is he bothered by something? He's afraid? Are you stressed out? Questions to which an immediate answer is often not found, and so crying, tears, screams, screams, cries continue. And in a vicious circle, the more the baby cries, the higher the stress level of the mother (or father), and the more the mother is stressed the more the baby cries. (Also read 8 tricks to calm the baby who cries often)





Here then you have to use some "strategies", first of all to calm oneself, and then only in a second moment to calm the child. Otherwise the risk is that of an escalation of stress, frustration and anger which can even lead to harm to the child: it is no coincidence that the shaking syndrome is, according to Pietro Ferrara, honorary judge at the Juvenile Court of the city and professor of Pediatrics at the Institute of Pediatric Clinic of the Catholic University of Sacro Cuore and the Campus Bio-Medico University of the city, "one of the main causes of death in the first year of life; 30% of children violently shaken die and 80% suffer serious permanent damage: cerebral haemorrhages, disabilities, paralysis, blindness ". (You may be interested in Ten Tips for a Peaceful Motherhood)

How to behave, then, to reassure the children?

According to Cathi Propper, a researcher in the Department of Developmental Sciences at the University of North Carolina, interviewed by Parents.com, "thanks to the support of parents, children gradually learn to deal with stressful episodes in the first year of life". But until they are able to cope with these moments on their own, they need help from mom or dad. For the scholar, there are five typical situations in which a child can suddenly start crying. and scream for no apparent reason.

In this article

 



  • Shopping in a busy supermarket
  • Lack of attention
  • Fatigue
  • Separation anxiety
  • Mom is stressed out

1. Shopping in a busy supermarket

Lights, noises, approaching strangers, unknown voices, sounds… While in some cases they can work as a sedative, they often cause babies a sensory short-circuit. At this point the best thing to do is quickly find a quiet corner and cuddle the baby while breastfeeding him.



When you are away from home, it is always best to bring a scarf or a sheet that is impregnated with the smell of the mother: according to a study by Gettysburg College in Pennsylvania, familiar smells help babies calm down faster.

2. Lack of attention

Your little one may begin to despair even in situations where you don't give him your full and complete attention. For example, if you are on the phone and the baby does not get an immediate response to a smile or a call, he may start crying in frustration as he feels ignored. The solution is that of make him feel your presence. By not stopping talking on the phone: just smile at him or give him a rattle. (See also Maternal love, 5 tips for building a good emotional bond with your baby)

3. Fatigue

Like you, too children can become tense, sensitive and irritable when exhausted. The solution is to move: take the baby in your arms and rock him with fast rhythmic movements, as if you were on a dance floor with rock music in the background. In fact, cradling it gently in these cases does not work.

During the summer, however, it is advisable to go out and take a walk in the park: the white noise of nature, together with the movement of the stroller, calms the child.

4. Separation anxiety

Especially between 6 and 8 months, the little one can suffer from separation anxiety if left with a person who is unknown to him, such as a babysitter. And he can start crying desperately.

The solution, in this case, is preventive: it is necessary to introduce gradually with the child the people to whom you want to entrust him. Exactly as happens with the inclusion in kindergarten. (Read also I Always Want Mom!)

8 PHOTOS

Tantrums, sleep, goodbye to the diaper and food: how to manage the critical moments of the baby

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Every day he fusses, he does not eat and does not want to sleep ... but even with the potty he is not so good, especially since his little brother arrived. In the early years of children there are many situations ...

5. Mom is stressed out

If you are not relaxed at first, your little one will be much less. "Children - explains Elizabeth Pantley, author of the book 'The sleep without tears' - seek in their parents answers to the mysteries of life. when you show signs of stress, the little one thinks there is something to be afraid of. And he cries for help".

The solution is not to hide one's emotions, but to show the little one that, even if you are stressed, you can calm down. A good way to do this is to uncover his tummy, put your lips on it and blow softly. The tickling sensation will calm him down, and the deep breathing needed to blow will relieve your stress. (See also SOS moms, stress under control)

If, on the other hand, the baby is already calm and peaceful, and you simply want him to relax, perhaps to promote sleep, you can resort to massage. Do it starting from the feet up to the head, massaging gently and continuing to talk to your little one as you massage him: for the baby it is an extremely pleasant and relaxing experience, which will help him fall asleep soundly in no time.

You may be interested in the video "How to deal with children's whims"

Questions and answers

What to do if the baby is fidgeting and crying when you are on the phone?

The solution is to make him feel your presence. By not stopping talking on the phone: just smile at him or give him a rattle.

What to do if the baby cries desperately when he is with the babysitter?

The solution, in this case, is preventive: it is necessary to gradually introduce the people to whom you want to entrust it with the child.

The mother is stressed and the baby is crying: what to do?

The solution is not to hide your emotions, but to show the little one that even if you are stressed, you can calm down. A good way to do this is to uncover his tummy, put your lips on it and blow softly.

TAG:
  • relax the baby
  • calm the baby
  • stress child
  • newborn 9-12 months
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