When every woman discovers that she is pregnant, whether it is the first time or not, she experiences a rainbow of emotions: joy and then anxiety, happiness and then fear. It is absolutely normal because, after all, pregnancy is just that: one of the most particular periods of life in which happiness and the impatience to become a mother merge with a thousand doubts and worries. And so she finds herself wondering: "Will I be a good mom?", "Will my baby be born healthy?", "Will I be able to endure sleepless nights?". Do not panic, thanks to the help of the psychologist and psychotherapist Margherita Benni, we have collected some useful tips for you to experience pregnancy in the most peaceful way possible.
In this article
- if in doubt, contact your doctor
- reduce stress
- manage emotions
- unsolicited advice
- fear of childbirth
- the importance of delegating
- get enough sleep
If in doubt ask the doctor, not Google
As soon as you discover that you are pregnant a river of emotions will overwhelm you and most likely you will start asking yourself a thousand questions. Instead of asking Dr. Google everything, rely on your family doctor, your gynecologist or your midwife who will be able to provide you with all the information you need and they will be able to answer all your doubts. "If you really can't resist the temptation to search for things on Google, then my advice is to put a timer on and not to stay on the internet more than the fixed amount of time because otherwise all you do is accentuate the state of anxiety" suggests the psychologist .
Having someone who follows you and who can help you find answers to doubts and fears, always legitimate during pregnancy, can really be a valid help.Read also: Dictionary of pregnancy
Indulge in a little daily pampering to reduce stress
A happy pregnancy is important for both mom and her baby. Children, in fact, they feel and live the emotions of the mother. According to science, stress in pregnancy increases a woman's risk of health problems and could also increase the risk of preterm birth and low birth weight.
To be peaceful, carefree and happy there is nothing better than that indulge in some pampering. "Trying to dedicate yourself to yourself, even simply by listening to some pleasant music or relaxing on the sofa, has positive effects for the psychological well-being of the expectant mother", explains the psychologist. Other valid alternatives could be:
- take a walk;
- read a book;
- watch a TV series;
- get a massage (from your partner or an expert).
"Even just closing your eyes and thinking about a pleasant image or a place that arouses positive feelings in us can help mothers relax and soothe any moment of anxiety," explains Benni.Read also: Massages in pregnancy
Breathing exercises can prove to be excellent allies for fight anxieties and fears, both during pregnancy and at the time of delivery. Breathing:
- promotes relaxation;
- reduces stress;
- provides a good supply of oxygen to both the mother and the baby.
You could also ask your partner to take a few minutes of breathing with you.Read also: Breathing exercises for slightly stressed moms
Yes, even to muscle relaxation exercises
Doing some muscle relaxation exercises or doing some yoga is really good for your body and mind. "Feeling the muscles of the body relax and stretch can give a pleasant feeling of well-being to the expectant mother" explains the psychologist.Read also: Yoga in pregnancy: 3 exercises to do at home
You can also pamper yourself with food
It is now known that during pregnancy it is not absolutely necessary to eat for two and indeed it is important to follow a healthy, varied and balanced diet as much as possible. However, this does not mean depriving oneself of the joy of good food. Preparing something delicious for you is a good way to pamper yourself and also to chase away any negative thoughts.Read also: Nutrition and pregnancy, useful tips
Remember that you are a woman, not a robot or a superhero
Of course, we have said that stress should be avoided, but there is no need to blame yourself if you sometimes experience conflicting emotions, if you are afraid or just have a bad day, it is completely normal. You always think that the nine months of pregnancy must be almost perfect and the woman should always be happy and smiling, but it just doesn't work like that. "We deny this belief - says the psychologist - nine months of pregnancy are nine months of life and in life things are not always perfect and everything goes right. It is therefore normal to have sad days, anxieties, outbursts of anger and worries because the pregnant woman is not a robot or a superheroine. It's important know how to forgive".Read also: My fears in pregnancy
No to alcohol and smoking, but also to unsolicited advice
Now is the time for some cynical advice, but one that will help you a lot. It is known, in fact, that when people discover that you are pregnant they immediately compete to dispense advice on any topic related to YOUR pregnancy. "It may be that friends, mothers or aunts want to help the future mum, and sometimes it is the woman herself who asks for some suggestions from those who have already lived this experience, but the case is different. someone tells you how you should feel and behave. If these opinions bother you or ruin your day, then try to "push them away", especially when they are not required "explains the psychologist.
No woman is born knowing how to be a mother and above all what it really means to be pregnant, but you discover it day after day, month after month and so it will happen to you too, don't get swayed excessively from the advice and judgments of others.Read also: How to defend yourself from intrusive relatives: 10 survival strategies
Are you afraid of childbirth? Welcome to the mothers-to-be club
Towards the beginning of the last trimester of pregnancy you will start thinking about the time of delivery and consequently the worries will start as well. Between movie scenes, friends' stories and experiences read online, does childbirth terrify you? Don't worry, you are not alone, it is a fear common to all future mothers. Doctors call it "tocophobia"and they say it is linked to human survival mechanisms.
"We know that each birth is unique and each woman is different so we cannot predict what the birth will be, how much pain you will have to endure and how long the labor will be. The important thing, however, is not to be excessively influenced by external opinions. fear is normal, indeed it would be worrying not to have any at all "specifies Margherita Benni, psychologist and psychotherapist. ask for help to the people around you, or to a psychologist who can help you overcome this obstacle. Talking to a midwife explaining what happens to your body during and after delivery can also help manage fear. "Preparto courses can certainly be of great help, where you can share your emotions and feelings with other women who are experiencing the same experience".
Read also: Fear of childbirth: how to deal with it
If you can, delegate some tasks
Another important factor for psychological well-being in pregnancy is the support, not just moral, of those who love you. "If they can, and they like it, it's good get help from relatives, friends, and especially from your partner, so that the expectant mother can feel lighter. It can be shopping, cleaning the house or cooking a meal, all small gestures that make the difference "remembers the psychologist." And then involving the partner is important for make the man feel a little more dad, especially during the nine months when pregnancy necessarily focuses only on the woman. ”For men it can be pleasant to do small actions that can help the expectant mother.Read also: Mothers, SOS stress: learn to ask for help
Don't forget the importance of sleep
Finally, a last piece of advice that may seem trivial, but which is not at all! Sleeping at least 7/8 hours every night is essential for a healthy pregnancy. Regular sleep improves physical as well as psychological well-being. We know that especially during the third trimester, due to the weight of the belly, you may struggle a little to rest peacefully; in this case, try using a pregnancy pillow every time you go to bed.
But above all, rest now that you have the chance because when the baby is born, sleeping 7 hours straight will probably be just a dream!Read also: How to sleep in pregnancy: the safest positions in the last trimester
- perinatal psychology
- psychological balance
- wellness in pregnancy